I woke up this morning with some things on my mind but most heavily was my mommy and how much I truly love and miss her every day. I've taken for granted that my mommy would ALWAYS be within reach and now that she has been in Texas over a year I understand that she is no longer there for me to hug, love and show my appreciation for each day. I think back to my childhood and how as a teenager my mother made the decision to have me and give up her life so that I could have each and everything that she didn't have and to give me the absolute best childhood a child could have. Funny for year I said that my mom was unable to see me compete in my basketball games and track meets and I would go out of my way to make sure to be there for my children. When you know better you do better and what I didn't know or rather didn't appreciate when I was making these statements is that my mom was WORKING. Busting her ass so that I could have all those extra things we wanted in life. There wasn't a day that I went without...funny, I remember working as teenager but I would have to be an idiot to believe my chump change paid for those Guess Jeans, Troop Jackets, Reebok Boots, Graduation Invitations, Caps and Gowns, daily lunches, gas in the car, beepers etc. etc etc. My middle name should have been IJUANA as a baby,child,teen,young adult cause "I WANTED IT" it all. While my dad was stationed in Hawaii I can remember my mom getting me a plane ticket to fly me back to California to pick out my prom dress so that no girl on that island would have one the same as mine. Interesting point about this is, I don't remember saying thank you and I damn sure don't remember her cursing me out when I returned to find out my boyfriend had cheated on me with some hooch and I changed my mind and decided not to go at all. She didn't blink and eye but instead told me that I would be wearing it to the next prom. During my unplanned teenage pregnancy, I rarely saw my mother as she busted her ass to make sure that those twins came into this world with nothing short of a Michael Jackson heir. They had double cribs, double strollers, double high chairs, double swings, double EVERYTHING!!! and mom and dad did double duty for sure. I could go on but somethings are better left unsaid, just know that she was truly a lifesaver in so many ways. As an adult my mother just like everyone has her ups and downs, good days and bad but she continues to be an amazing woman of God, the best grandmother (ya-ya) that a child can ask for and truly a blessing to me each and every day. This post could have gone on for days on end with talks of how much I truly love and appreciate her. PS. I miss coming to sleep in your bed in between you and my daddy. Hey Mama! I love you -
click below for my current song dedicated to my mommy!