Status Update...Road to NPC

The life of a figure competitor...my journey continues. So I just decided to put up a few of the recent happenings on my quest to make top 5. To those who are in the circuit Top 5 is what a competitor aspires for and after that the obsession takes over. Me, Nesha is a bit backward though so although I haven't had a top 5 call out, I have completely skipped that in my mind and have gone to the center spot.  I want the Top prize. The sword, the overall. I've become slightly insane in my journey too.

I'm the passenger in the car, looking out the window. No one need to ask me what I'm thinking about. They already know. My eyes wake up in the morning and I say "thank you Lord" in my mind and the next thought is "gotta go hard today". By nature I'm a little girl. Little, literally. I'm small boned, small muscled. The only thing big about me is my hands and my feet.  This is probably the toughest obession I could have picked up for several reasons. It's a dog fight EVERY single day to build this muscle, its expensive, it's time consuming. I don't care about any of that. I want the sword.

My mom flew back to Texas last week and before she departed she said that she thought broccolli was one of her favorite foods before visiting my house. She has grown to detest the smell of broccolli and grilled chicken. I'm sure the men in my house agree. Hey, if I gotta clean up turf beads and sweaty socks all day, they have to smell my clean food.  I'm ten weeks out from the Governor's Cup in Sacramento.  I see my body changing but not enough for me. I'm hoping I'll be more pleased in another two weeks or so. Time is growing short and I'm beginning to feel anxious. I know I need to unwind. All those who matter say I'm night and day from my last competition, however if it's not going to get me Top 5, it's worthless in my opinion.  Gotta go, time to eat.



Idris (with his fine self) won a Golden Globe
Revelations 22:3

RealPlayer downloads YouTube videos

I see progress, slowly (10 weeks to go)

My NO Saints, I still love them, win or lose

The new Kobe Commercial (gotta be a Kobe fan)
living one day at a time


when my toes are ice cold

the beginning of a new semester in school

justice is blind, literally

President Obama signed NDAA

they don't make songs like this anymore

taking that first step out of bed on winter mornings

Real Housewives

slow progress (10 weeks to go)

the way Patron leaves me feeling

the boys are into Polo now...expensive as hell

Tomorrow isn't promised


So I'm a Flake

All I have in this world is my balls and my word! Ok scratch the “balls” I don’t have those! But who would want em anyway. They’re wrinkled, sweaty, and don’t serve much purpose ESPECIALLY if they hang lower than Mr. Winky. Wait, what was I taking about again? My word! Oh yes, my word! I was examining the history of my word when I realized: I AM A TOTAL FLAKE and SUPREME PROCRASTINATOR!!! I’m sure the people close to me already figured this out, but after 30+ years being me it just hit me today. And I’m talking like a swift Ike Turner punch to the face. I do believe there is nothing worse than a coked out punch from Ike!

Now before you turn your nose up (like your butt is perfect) let me explain. I often make plans and I really do intend on attending but I get tired easily, especially after a long day of errands, work, kid activities and training. So I don’t show up, but I do call and let them know I’m not coming. Sometimes I get a non-response other times I get a non-invite for 6 months. As far as the procrastination goes, I want to do a lot but I don’t have the time. Granted my attention span is shorter than Emmanuel Lewis in ballet flats, I"m working on it.
Is there some kind of rehab that I can check myself into! I can’t die from flakiness and bull-crapinness (let’s pretend this is a word). I’m real sad about today’s self discovery. BUT HEARETH ME YE: on this day I declareth to NOT flaketh thou friends and Procrastinateth against thou self!!! Wish me luck, Lord knows I have a feeling I am going to flake out on this…….

Rambling Thoughts

Inception is a remarkable documentary with a very unique storyline. I recommend to all who have yet to see. Just when you think that you have witnessed, read or heard it all, here comes a screenplay which leaves you captivated, and discussing the plot long after the final credits have rolled. Think The Sixth Sense meets The Matrix.

Where they do dat at: Here it is 2011 and I am amazed there are still people who turn their backs on the very ones who had been there for them, time and time again. If that isn't enough, these same people will turn around and be there for the ones who turned their backs on them in the first place.

If I have ever learned anything in life: I have learned that society might discriminate upon the color of your skin, economic status, hairstyle, gender, beliefs, your troubled past, educational background, insecurities, whatever. But regardless of those supposed drawbacks, please understand one thing; the most important thing - they can never ever knock your hustle. I swear to God.

Cool points to anyone who can name the recording artist who spoke these sentiments: "Mommas, don't let your kids watch television, until they know how to read. Or else all they'll know how to do is cut, fight and bleed. No child is bad from the beginning. They only imitate their atmosphere."
Looking forward to the game this weekend against the Saints and the Niners. I will be there sitting amongst Niners fans and daring them to say a word as I cheer my Saint.
Lastly, I appreciate all who frequent Powerful Beyond Measure and offer discussion upon various subjects and views being discussed. I love reading and writing blogs and value the emails that encourage me to keep posting - I will try to keep the blog updated.

I am writing a romantic short story. I'm making sure to edit and re-edit and I refuse to put any disclaimers on it.
Blessings, Nesha


All Things Me

I take pleasure in my transformations. I look quiet and consistent, but few know how many women there are in me. - Me-

So I'll admit it, I'm a bit of a bipolar, multipersonality, sociopathic, egotistical, self-analyzing, forever critiquing myself mess...at times. I know this and at least I'll admit it. I want more, want to be more, am reaching for me, dream about more. Nesha is never quite enough for Nesha.  In the midst of mi vida loca I want it all and still more.  I saw the Crossfit Challenge Finals on tv last week and thought to myself "if they didn't look like they would tear a rotor cuff or break a collar bone in some of those movements  I might actually try to win that thing before I turn 40.   I bought Rosetta Stone so  I could learn spanish, I am still contemplating piano lessons. I dream of a long bucket list of a million things I wish to aspire to before my half century mark. Currently is my next contest in just under 11 weeks.  I'm a bit short of where I wanted to be but I'm hoping to be able to make some major improvements in the next few weeks and go into over-drive. Top 5, I'm coming for you.

In other news, the 18 year olds went against me forbidden them and gave themselves a much begged for birthday present. I'm disappointed but in the day of tattoos on the neck, forearms and back I'm happy its in an easily hideable place. Twin B said it was nothing like what he thought. He had no idea why people would think this was addictive and never wanted another one. Twin A was quick to let me know Twin B cried through most of the inking process.  "The Strength of a Family is like an Army" are the inscribed words. hhhhmmmm, at least they stuck to something intelligent and that's all I have to say about that.

In the meantime I've found a new favorite song. I love it. Sooooo, what do you think?


Do Unto Others

For as long as I can remember I've always been the type of person who believed that if you treated people good and kind-heartedly, in turn, they'd treat you the same. To me, this is a growing concept which makes perfect sense. Not only does such reciprocity garners respect, but it actually bodes well for humanity.
Imagine that.
It also forces spirituality. Which I believe to be exactly what Jesus Christ had in mind when He inhabited the Earth and attempted to show its inhabitants a better way. The only way, really. But, as life would have it, and as Jesus himself learned, The Golden Rule isn't necessarily practiced here. Not on a whole it isn't. Only preached. Apparently, not everyone received the memo.
Just a few. The limited number whose souls won't allow them to be anything other than of peace and good will, whose eyes are actually watching God. Those who awake to a world where the load appears lighter, grass greener, sun brighter.

Unfortunately, these are the same ones whose good deeds are often overshadowed by the characters who treat people one way and expect to be treated another, mistake kindness for weakness, always plotting.
And, of course, those who are perceived to be angels standing in the light. Yet, are nothing more than devils in the dark. In their hearts.
All of which leads to inner conflict otherwise known as spiritual struggle, where one then questions the struggles between good and bad, right and wrong, peace, war, everlasting life, eternal death, free will. In other words, the world in which we currently live. An infinitely confused world that many somehow believe will better itself.
But why? How? If we as humans on a whole cannot do unto others as we'd have them do unto us, then what does that say about us? And what are we saying towards the God in which we all pray?

I mean, really say?