8th Grade Graduation

Monday I had the honor of attending my boys' 8th grade graduation. I was excited as most parents were to see them dress in a tie and slacks instead of a white tee and baggy jeans and march in front of their peers and parents. They've worked hard during junior high to do well and move to the next level. I felt bad though as I have been fighting this feeling all week of a little something stirring inside of me. It begin as I watched an acquaintance fussing over invitations to her daughter's 8th grade party that was well over $3000 for the party cost. Standing in line to buy a balloon was a mother who was fussing about the graduation cake, her mother who was not attending and the whole family being upset about it, the $300 suit her son would be wearing etc etc etc only to find her sitting a few rows down from me at the graduation ceremony. Am I really that non-chalent about this whole thing? It seems that everywhere I look this 8th grade graduation is a serious ordeal. Boys wear ties, girls' are dressed like it's prom, with 10 inch heels to match, flowers and car decorations with white shoe polish. The kids had 3 rehearsals to assure a flawless filing in and out of the multi purpose room. We were even given 8 tickets for each student. Not to mention the graduation gowns. I just kept thinking, they are only leaving junior high school. I guess I have to look at it in terms of the fact that we do live next door to Stockton Unified...termed a "drop out factory", just a few years ago by some "scholars" at a University. I guess some will not make it to the next ceremony. I was quite amazed when the boys told me just how many of their peers were not able to compete in the ceremony because they had not met 8th grade graduation requirements. I would prefer that this ceremony be scaled down to save the climactic celebration for future graduations, like those in high school and college. My concern is that the over-the-top ceremony too closely resembles high school graduation and implies finality rather than a transition to further education. Leave it to me to want to call it "8th grade promotion". We are promoting them to high school. It's not really a milestone but more of a benchmark. Going through the ceremony makes us feel proud, for some they've made it halfway through. They aren't the class of 2008 but instead the class of 2012. I bought them a nice outfit and clapped as their names were called, took a few pictures but I want them to be sent the right message. This is nice and sweet but we have work to do. They are going on to high school.

By the way - this goes for those wonderful parents who also think it's such a wonderful thing to throw parties for 6 year olds graduating from Kindergarten :-). Congrats to my boys...now get to work. 4 more years of work to do....and 4 more years after that.

Got Sanity?

So I'm at that point this month were I'm feeling BEYOND overwhelmed. You know that time when you are so completely overloaded with life that even though all your appointments are in your blackberry you just don't know how you are going to get to them all. The thought of my list for the next three weeks is enough to make me want to crawl back into bed and hide my face under the pillow. There won't be downtime for quite sometime but I know this too shall pass. Think of me and pray you don't see on the news that "MOTHER OF FIVE HAS RUN AWAY TO CABO SAN LUCAS TO START A NEW LIFE, FAMILY WONDERS WHAT THEY DID WRONG" :-)

Obama...Change is here

To all who embraced changed from the beginning and knew that everything would be okay on June 3rd, today is our day. I went to sleep last night so proud of our country. I had no idea that 2008 would not only bring such a change a white WOMAN and a AFRICAN american competing to be the Democratic Candidate. Barack you have inspired the masses. You have inspired my own children. I am so happy to be able to tell CJ who asks me every morning "Mommy did Barack Obama win yet?", "almost baby, we are almost there". No matter what happens from this moment on, Michelle and Barack have made history. Bash him as you will, talk about his church, his father, his mother whatever you chose, but this is a man who knew his destiny from day 1. He's made sure that his kindergarten files are clean. Barack we honor you. Thank you for change.

Longing for the Days of Innocence

So lately, I've really begun to see the boys turn the corner...the corner to becoming young men. It makes me so nervous. I know I'm preparing them but it was so much safer when they were right here next to me. This weekend we went to a tournament in Reno. We stayed in Circus Circus and although the twins and several of their teammates hung out the whole time I was so nervous each time they left the hotel room. I watched them as they prepared to go out ironing their clothes, picking out shoes, brushing their hair (only to put a hat on). There was a time when they would stay in their basketball uniforms the entire weekend and I'd have to peel it off of their skin at the end of the weekend. Craig and I decided to do just a little spying to catch a glimpse of them in the arcade with the other million kids there and we finally found them. What were they do?....NOTHING, just walking around, hunging out, laughing at people passing by, flirting with girls, being kids. When I came back home I found out that there at being a fight this weekend between some of the local high school boys and a friend of Taylor's was hurt very badly during the altercation. This took me right back to my previous thoughts. I know we can't protect them all the time but I just worry so much about what may come when we are not around to protect them. I know they have to go out and have a life but I'm hoping to keep them near as long as possible....to be continued

Rev. Wright

I watched some of Reverend Wright's speech this morning at the National Press Club. It seems obvious to me that he's doing everything he can to wipe out Obama's candidacy, and I'll tell you why I think it is. I think that people like Reverend Wright -- and I think there are a lot of other race business hustlers out there, by the way, who are really upset that if a black candidate is elected president, that they're going to be somehow diminished in their task, at keeping everybody in their flocks all revved up and angry about the ages old sin of slavery and the ongoing discrimination.
In my opinion, if you look at Reverend Wright, listen to what he says and analyze it from the context or perspective of what's best for him, which is clearly all he's interested in, what's best for him is that if Obama loses, because then it's easy for him to say, "See, the white power structure doesn't want a black man to rise to the pinnacle of power in the United States of America."
It would certainly fuel Reverend Wright's future and continue to help him raise money and keep people whipped up into a frenzy. He's not helpful. Whatever he thinks he's doing, it is not helpful to Barack Obama.

Letter of Rebuttal - Points I enjoyed

I recently read a letter from a 78 year old woman who wrote a Letter of Rebuttal to those who were offended by Michelle Obama's comments stating "for the first time in her adult life she was proud to be an American". I enjoyed this letter so much I thought I'd share.

"As a 78 year old American of African descent, I feel compelled to respond to all this “much ado about nothing” when it comes to the statement that Michelle Obama made about the fact that this is the first time in her adult life that she has been proud to be an American.
The country needs to hear this from the Black perspective.
Long before I was born, my grandfather Joseph Burleson, owned a considerable amount of land in oil rich Texas . Because during that era, Blacks could not vote, nor could they contest anything in the courts of the United States , my grandfather’s land was STOLEN by his White neighbor. My grandfather, who was literate and better educated than my grandmother, drove to town. Seeing my grandfather leave, the covetous neighbor asked my grandmother to show him the deed to the property. He snatched it. She could not insist that he give it back, nor could she have reported this THEFT to the sheriff because of the fact that Blacks had no rights in the 1800’s. The prevailing law at that time was he who held the deed owned the land. Do you think that is something that I am PROUD OF? Right now I should be living off the oil and gas royalties.
In 1934 when my dad drove us to Texas to meet his family, when he stopped to purchase gasoline, his daughters and wife were not allowed to use the washroom. As a man it was easier for his to relieve himself in the bushes, but not for the females. We were, however, reduced to having to go in the bushes, also. Do you think I am PROUD OF THAT?
In 1938 when my oldest sister went to enroll in Hyde Park High School , she was told by the counselor that she did not want to take college preparatory courses, she wanted to study domestic science. Do you think I’m PROUD OF THAT? Of course, when Beatrice Lillian Hurley-Burleson went to school the next day, that was the last time anyone thought that the Burleson girls wanted to study domestic science.
When in 1943 my parents attempted to buy the 2 flat at 5338 South Kenwood, where we had lived since 1933, in Hyde Park, Chicago, IL we were told that we could not buy it because there was a restrictive covenant that said that the property was never to be sold to “Negroes.” Do you think I am PROUD OF THAT?
In 1950 when I graduated from college, I was unable to get a job because I was considered “overqualified.” the code word for they would not hire me because of my race. All of the want ads called for Japanese Americans or Neisis ( the word given to Japanese Americans at that time). Do you think that was something that I should have been PROUD OF? I understood that America was trying to make up for the interning of innocent and patriotic Americans who were our enemy by association.
My cousin’s barbershop was bombed in Mississippi in the 50’s because he was encouraging Black people to register to vote. His wife who had earned a Masters Degree from Northwestern University lost her position as the principal of the local school because of the voter registration activities. Is that something I should be PROUD OF?
Now we get to Rev. Jeremiah Wright, the pastor of the Obama family. Rev. Wright like so many religious zealots overstates many things, that many of his members do not agree with. To suggest that Senator Obama should leave the church of his choice is not only a double standard, but it is absurd. Would any of the talking heads who are so alarmed by Rev. Wright’s thoughts and speeches suggest that Catholics should abandon their faith or denounce and reject the Pope because so many priests have molested children. These children were exploited and taken advantage of and they had no choice to even know they could resist, reject and denounce. To me the situations are parallel, except for the fact that the priests behavior is a physical violation of the innocence of children who are marred for life; and the priests behavior is a crime. Rev. Wright’s speeches are just words, that one can listen to or not, the members have a choice. Should Governor Romney denounce and reject the Mormon Church because some of their members practice polygamy?
As Senator Obama has previously stated, we have entered the silly season.
Barack Obama is an adult, and most importantly, he is an exceptionally intelligent adult. Like most of us adults, fortunately, we do not accept all we hear or see. If we did, the world would be more amoral, debased and perverted than the world of today is.
I see all these “so called” ponderings an attempt to marginalize the candidacy of Senator Barack Obama. I cannot truly call this racism because some ignorant Blacks have also spoken disparagingly about him....I accept this as the darker side of mankind who because of their own inadequacies, they project their deficiencies on others. Barack Obama is a very rare individual, the likes of whom the world seldom sees. Like most geniuses, they are often misunderstood. They are objects of envy and jealousy. They are suspect because they soar above the average man who does not have the intellectual ability to understand the greatness of special people. They are also targets to be pulled down to the level of the mediocre who cannot stand to see an individual with deep convictions and high standards.
We have not seen a phenomena like Barack Obama in many years and many generations. Like Ghanda, like Jesus, like Einstein, like Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., like Mother Theresa, genetically, intellectually and spiritually, these people offer the world so much, but they are often maligned and misunderstood....Because of his family background, the influence of his beloved mother who instilled great values in him, the influence of his absent father who vicariously inspired a son to go to Harvard as the father had done, the influence of a minister who brought him to an understanding of the value and meaning of Christianity, the influence of a brilliant Harvard educated wife who inspires him and keeps him grounded; he is the epitome of a citizen of the world. He is of the world because the world is in him; and this is what America needs to bring us out of the abyss to which we have sunk in the eyes of the world.
Like, Michelle Obama, after living in this country all of my 78 years, loving my country and not understanding why my country has not loved me, I now for the first time in my adult life feel PROUD OF MY COUNTRY because I sense a maturing, a recognition of talent and character, and not color, and a field of candidates aspiring to lead this nation coming from very diverse backgrounds of gender, religious beliefs, national origin, ethnicity, age and experiences. This to me is the HOPE that America is coming into her own and will begin to CHANGE and will embrace the philosophy upon which this country was founded, where all men are created equal and are entitled to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. Now I truly believe, YES WE CAN!

School and Views (Just mine)

My husband and I have been blessed with talented sons.
They are bright, articulate, creative and motivated, and they love more than anything to excel in sports, which presented us with some options when it came time to choose a high school.
We could have let them follow their junior high friends to the next level, the local public school. We could have settled and went against what our minds were pulling us to do. We have chosen to pursue the academic/athletic excellence of a private school. We have chosen to send them to a private school for a more favorable teacher-to-student ratio. We've chosen to guide them in a direction we feel will best benefit them in their future.
It requires a full-time, family commitment to the curriculum, many long nights-into-mornings of homework, it means we will have to provide transportation to and from school every day.
We are doing it for one reason: Our responsibility as parents is to give our children the best possible chance to succeed in life, and preparing them to receive a college education is the cornerstone of that creed.
In junior high they expressed a desire to find out more about this school, we followed are minds and hearts and decided to follow what we feel. The question is, 'is their athletic aptitude great enough to serve as a gateway to a college education?' For this decision some feel we should be commended others feel we are backstabbing our community and have chosen to ostricize us as well as our children for it.
Those sports, for now are basketball and football. To get the best football/basketball instruction available in our area, to test their skills against the most difficult competition, and to have the chance to be seen by scouts and coaches representing the nation's elite college programs. All this, while getting the academic attention necessary to meet NCAA entrance requirements.
In my opinion no athletic program in the our current school district has displayed the resources, ability or desire to match the complete commitment this school has shown to pursuing excellence in sports.
Anticipating the comments, I would like to point out that I am not on the their' payroll. I am not the school's head cheerleader. I do not serve as the sports information director.
But I do understand the sporting climate in our area, and how by building itself into a regional powerhouse the school has opened itself to criticism, including facing many of the same accusations hurled at some of the other privates in our area for basketball and football over the the last two decades.
It's so easy to blindly accuse a private school of recruiting players, when the truth is that the exact opposite is occurring -- players and their parents seek out and recruit themselves to top programs.
Every student at every private school, whether an athlete or not, resides in a public school district. For each parent, the private school provided something for their child not offered at their designated public high school.
But somehow, when that primary reason for enrolling at a private school is a sport, it's deemed seedy. Parents and schools are accused of losing perspective when in fact they're the ones seeing the big picture with clarity, understanding that whether in the classroom, the athletic field or in life, the goal is the same -- to struggle, sweat and strive to learn, because only then can you gain the confidence necessary to perform at the highest level in life's difficult situations.
You enroll your young athlete at childrens' high school knowing the time commitment can be overwhelming. There are long practices, summer leagues, perhaps travel ball, and it all comes on top of and after meeting the school's academic requirements.
...to be continued

Cayden

My angel baby continues to shine. Just a little over 3 years ago Craig and I sat under a freeway underpass with the knowledge that we would soon be parents again. We were filled with so much emotion and to be honest not all of it was good. We sat under that underpass in silence for about an hour within many thoughts swirling through our minds. When we drove away we went home and slept, for hours and we knew that Cayden would soon be here.

It's funny, we call him the lottery baby because we've been winning since he got here. When it seems there has been no way, God has made a way. Not just in the last 3 years but it seems our faith has been tested so much more, in life, love, family, work and just the world. Not to mention a championship basketball and football team, but of course we have to include the players in that one as well :-).

From day one Cayden has had to fight, he was unexpected and tiny, he had severe eczema, psorasis, his skin disorder was so bad his skin was filled with sores constantly and his hair fell out almost completely. He was so itchy that he cried almost non-stop for the first few months. When we finally found relief for him he became the most perfect baby. Slept in his own bed, ate whatever was offered and just laid low. Recently his snoring increased and we took to calling him Darth Vader because we usually had to turn up the tv or radio to hear over his breathing. His snores could be heard from inside his room all the way down into the kitchen and God forbid he fell asleep in the car, we had to shout to hear each other. When the snoring combined with sleep apenea which stopped him from breathing several times a night the doctor decided to remove his tonsils and adnoids this past Tuesday. Cayden did fine, he is recovery well and home with daddy on vacation this week. He feels really good when his pain medication kicks in and he has eaten about 2 boxes of popsicles. Thank you to my friends and family who supplied the prayers for a safe surgery and speedy recovery. The Lord is good!