A long while back a friend said I was negative. Okay, he didn’t exactly call me negative, but after he asked a series of questions to which I responded negatively, his face said it all. It really made me analyze myself: Do I see the world through grey colored glasses? Maybe I did, maybe I didn't, but after careful consideration, I admitted to myself, I probably had the tendency to speak of it that way. I think back then I hid my inner Negative Nancy from myself for so long, by adding an upbeat and chipper voice and Colgate grin to all my complaining; and topping it off with a positive spin. But ugly is ugly, both inside and out!
I blog and talk a lot about what confounds me. On my page to you all, in realy life, to those I feel safe with. I’m obsessed with figuring out why the world as I see it- generally odd and scary- is… well, odd and scary. But I see beauty too. I see more beauty than I give myself credit for seeing. As a matter of fact, there’s so much beauty around me that the odd and scary pretty much drive me insane; without it, this world would be amazing. But odd and scary are here to stay-it started with a serpent and who knows how it’ll end- so some things just have to be looked beyond and spoken over.
So whatever tint the glasses are, the world is kaleidoscopic and very few things are better than…
Having a really good Monday. Running into someone who says "Heyyyy, I was just thinking about you". Smiling children who ask for constant hugs. Doing good for others. Waking up earlier than you have to and being okay with it. A conversation with your best friend where neither of you annoy each other. A quiet moment. Taking a nap just because you want to. Realizing you’re a better person than you used to be, even in the most miniscule way. Putting together the perfect outfit. Laughing so hard your belly hurts. Breakfast for dinner. Getting a compliment from another women, it's so hard to now a days. A really good church service. Reeses Peanut Butter Cups, frozen. Three day weekends. Full fledge vacations. Staycations with the ones you love. Finding your keys. Hearing the song you used to LOVE when you were younger. Listening to the stories of an elderly person- the nice ones. The end of the semester. Every now and then, letting someone have it who deserves it, so they back off a little. A smirk when a smart alec says something "they think" is incredibily funny. Exes who get fat! Life fulfilling careers. Freedom. The idea of making love in the rain even though I wouldn't because I hate being cold. The hot bubble bath after a long day. An incredible foot massage that is long enough to enjoy. My grandma’s fried cornbread (I miss it). My mother’s hugs. My daddy’s smiles. Life as it is/was/will be.
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